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PAMMY “How to Eat Your Greens”

Posted on Feb 10, 2015 | 0 comments

Pammy and I go way back, but we came together in the weirdest way. We met at a Procter & Gamble popup salon: I needed my roots done and was walking over to Mark’s old office at Yonge and Bloor, when I found myself outside a salon that had sprung up overnight and was giving hair colour as a promotion. I’ve always had trouble resisting a crazy deal (and maybe I was feeling more adventurous than usual) so I stepped inside the salon in desperate need (these were the days before ombre was a thing) and met my hair’s saviour: Pam.

About an hour later I walked out as the best blonde I had ever been (sorry all, it wasn’t my natural Swede shining through) and I knew I had to see Pam again and again. Later, when I called by again to connect with her, the receptionist told me my new top fave hair stylist had left the popup gig to go on tour with The Jackson Five (not including Michael) and that her thriving music career would now be taking precedent over her massive gifts in the hair department. I was crushed, however, after a lot of canoodling, I shmoozed the girl into passing on Pam’s email address. HA: Mommy wins every time.

Over the next several years, we laughed and cried together and told each other our secrets over hair dye experiments, logo development, hair extensions and countless other convos accompanied by tea and snacks. And for those many years, I managed to maintain my gorgeous blonde hair followed by a lovely, demure, more mommy-like shade of brown. I squeezed in appointments between recording and touring and then a wedding to her true love and the birth of a beautiful baby girl.


One time Pam brought Maddy over to hang out  while she did my hair. I remember that she spat up  on the floor and freaked me out. Now I am covered  in Sebastian’s spit up all day and it’s just normal, I  almost feel naked unless I’ve been barfed on at least  once.

Pam knew I would have you before I did. She saw  that sparkle in my eye and warned me about how  much I’d love you and how amazing it would  be. Now she gloats at every opportunity she gets  because you are my world, my life is forever changed  and I can’t deny that everything she said was true.

So when Pam tells you to eat your greens, my  darling, listen to what she says: she knows things.

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